In our home, we’ve posted the Johnson Family 12 Commandments (10 was not enough). A simple list to guide Zaniya and Julius in daily choices: no complaining about meals, use gentle hands, no jumping on furniture, and most important, for my sanity, NO SCREAMING!
While the list helps curb disruptive behavior, that’s not our ultimate goal. The list helps us identify deeper heart issues. If we are struggling with not complaining that reveals a spirit of ungratefulness that has infected our heart, which does not align with the will of God. “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NIV)
Likewise, if we are struggling to use kind words and gentle hands, it’s not a lack of politeness, but a more dangerous offense of lacking love and compassion. “Anyone who claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar.”1 John 4:20 (NIV)
Behavior is the fruit, but the heart is the root. If we focus only on outward actions, we miss the deeper transformation God desires, a heart transformation. “For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” Luke 6:45 (NIV).
Thankfully, we’re not left to fix ourselves. “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.” Ezekiel 36:26 (NIV) As we remain in His presence, soaking in His Word, walking in the Spirit, He reshapes our hearts. Our job is to go to Him and trust Him to finish the work He started. “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6 (NIV)
At the end of the day, we reflect on our day and help lead the kids in prayer for turning to God for forgiveness and the strength to do better the next day. It often goes like this.
Heavenly Father, we thank You for all You have blessed us with, and we thank You for sending Your son to die on the cross for the forgiveness of our sins. Please forgive me for all the times I didn’t show love to those around me, forgive me for when I didn’t show patience, or gratefulness for what You have given us. Please give me the strength and empower me with Your Holy Spirit to do better tomorrow. Thank You that I can find comfort and confidence in Your forgiveness, and everlasting love. Amen.
